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Potty Training

April 27, 2012 by 6 Comments

We are nearing the end of a year long journey, that in retrospect, seems so simple. It’s the journey that has eliminated (mostly) the need for diapers. At the beginning of our potty training efforts, our great friend, Peggy, advised us that no matter the difficulties of the process, we could rest assured that Ezra would not be going to prom in diapers. I can’t tell you how many times over the past year that thought has comforted us.

The early stages of the process was mostly dedicated to having Ezra sit on the potty when he showed interest (or we forced interest), but never netted anything other than him sitting on the potty. It didn’t even amount to a successful accident (at least that I can remember), and certainly didn’t lead to any continued interest on Ezra’s behalf. We had a struggle filled weekend or three – mostly on Ahna’s behalf, and we had some tense moments as we entered the conversation about pre-school. The promise of the beginning of his schooling and a few ‘free’ mornings a week, was threatened by a lack of ability to wear underwear, and that was particularly difficult for me to grasp….thankfully it wasn’t realized, as he was allowed to go to preschool, and the teachers were exceptionally willing to work with him as needed.

Part of the realization for us – apart from the whole prom thing – was that potty training (and with that insight, probably a whole lot of things to come) was going to happen when Ezra was good and ready, and not a moment sooner than that. We looked to Ezra for moments, conversations, suggestions, or any indicator of interest, but they really didn’t come. He was completely comfortable being in diapers – not influenced by any amount of peer pressure – and he was equally fine with a wet or dirty diaper. As a battle of wills goes, this one went to Ezra. As a battle of patience goes, this one went to us.

We had come to the conclusion over these months that since Ezra is so smart, and that he would start when he was ready, that it would be a quick and painless process. Painless, it has been….but I’m not sure if it’s been quick. I mean, it hasn’t taken months, but it didn’t get done in three days. Ezra started showing good interest in the beginning of March, and progress followed. On our recent trip to my Grandparent’s house in Florida, he followed in my footsteps and nailed down all of the basics of potty training there. We are making it through the night most of the time, staying dry during naps all of the time, and successfully making it to the bathroom 99% of the time – which is a better percentage than some of our friends. The only part of this that we haven’t gotten down is the wiping, which seems like an equally as confusing process to teach as it probably is to learn.

For now, staying in diapers certainly would be a lot less time consuming, a lot less stressful for us, and maintains a much cleaner bathroom. Aiming is a skill that is never mastered. But, this is a major life accomplishment for both Ezra and us that will ultimately make things a lot more freeing. At this point, I can’t remember what I used to fill our conversation quiet moments with before “do you have to go pee? do you have to go poop? are you sure?” entered our lives.

But I’m glad it’s there.

Filed Under: Ezra!

An Incredible, Insightful Poem

April 15, 2012 by Leave a Comment

This is a poem written by a beautiful young person that we knew, who recently committed suicide. I understand that there are lots of reasons and influences for someone to take such a drastic measure, but the words in here speak volumes. Please take a minute to read them, hear them, and apply their meaning to your job as a friend/parent/spouse/child. The name of the author has been intentionally left non-complete as to allow for the most amount of privacy possible. Do not copy, publish, or otherwise use this anywhere without getting consent from the family.

Young Taylor, we will apply your insight and advice as best we can to our everyday life, in every role possible. Thank you for sharing.

written by Taylor

Buried alive, captured and suffocated in the folds.
The dark is so loud and practically blinding.
It gets harder everyday knowing the challenges of the day ahead.
The labels that teens stick on to your back.
It’s hard being yourself as it is.
Engulfed in a life of manufactured personalities.
By everyone turning into what they think they should be.
Music blasting to tune out sound.
Absolutely silent when no one’s around.
Even when your head is throbbing.
Working through a long, endless day.
It seems to be your own hand turning up the volume.
This age of 14 can make your head spin.
Even though it’s the age where life really begins.
Heartbreaks, crying, laughing,
maybe like me, go into depression.
Already, I’ve had one too many therapy sessions.
Just listen now, this is a confession.
Drama is unnecessary, it make me livid.
Talking stuff about others.
Don’t even know them, at least not enough.
See, like I said, 14 is tough.

Filed Under: Life in General

Florida, Spring Break Style

April 14, 2012 by 2 Comments

Yea, if you came this far and were expecting something from the clubs of Panama City, Miami, or Key West – that’s a different time in a different life. This spring break story is about a trip to north Florida (aka southern Georgia), a hot and humid place that just happens to have my Grandparent’s living there, the first Firehouse Subs location, and just about nothing else that would make someone want to go there. But, like I mentioned, it does have family and family history – and that far, far outweighs the downsides of the area.

We were fortunate this year to have the time over Ahna’s spring break to head down to Florida to visit with my Grandparents, and to help them celebrate some pretty dang big milestones. My Grandfather (PopPop) turned 90 back in February, and the two of them are celebrating their 65th wedding anniversary this month. They continue to amaze us by living, working, and operating on their own – in their own house, with their own car, and their own woodshop/workshop. I mean, PopPop (with the help of two good friends) installed a backyard fence recently….seriously. The two of them serve as the foundation for our amazing family, and they are a space-sized pillar of both physical and mental strength, as well as great role models for what a successful relationship should look like. Needless to say, we were very happy to be able to celebrate with them.

While there, we tripped to the Museum of Science and History, and to the beach; but we mostly enjoyed each others company and watching the two of them interact with Ezra. Ezra took to them as soon as we walked into their house for the first time – which is always a concern for someone that young after not seeing them for about two years (thank goodness for lots of pictures to reference on the home computer). We had the occasion to host a party at their house with some close friends and family to celebrate their milestones, and seeing everyone together was such a treat for all of us. Dad and I also took a day to head down to the Palatka area and go bass fishing (12 caught).

Outside of the party, perhaps the highlight of the trip was watching Ezra and PopPop build something together in his shop. They cut out, sanded, painted, and signed a wooden airplane that Ezra was able to bring home with us. Of course, the camera wasn’t too far away, but it will be a great memory for them to share for a lifetime. The other highlight for us was watching Ezra play at the beach. We went over to Jacksonville Beach (Atlantic side of the state), and Ezra just played and giggled in the slightly-too-chill water while we all made every attempt to stay mostly dry.

Filed Under: Ezra!, Life in General, Photos Included

A Snowy Day, Ezra Jack Keats

April 13, 2012 by 2 Comments

One of the primary places that we discovered the name Ezra, was from a children’s book named A Snowy Day. It was written by Ezra Jack Keats, and was a childhood favorite of Ahna’s. Well, this year it celebrates it’s 50th anniversary, and it holds a very important and special place in the world of children’s books….learn more about it in this NPR story from a few months ago:

One morning many years ago, a little boy in Brooklyn named Peter woke up to an amazing sight: fresh snow.

Peter is the hero of the classic children’s book by Ezra Jack Keats, The Snowy Day, which turns 50 this year. Peter has a red snowsuit, a stick just right for knocking snow off of trees, and a snowball in his pocket. And, though this is never mentioned in the text, Peter is African-American.

For the full text, and downloadable audio file: click here.

Filed Under: Ezra! Tagged With: ,

46 Months!

April 8, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Filed Under: Ezra!, Photos Included

10 Years Of Ahna & Oren

March 11, 2012 by 6 Comments

2002: I was fresh off of three weeks at the Olympics in Salt Lake City, 25 years old, and almost three years on the job. I had just bought a new house, was still living with a few other guys, and enjoyed going to Sancho’s for drinks and conversation. Ahna was in her first year with Denver Public Schools with a class she had picked up part of the way through the school year, and was recently completed with an amazing volunteer year with the Urban Servant Corps. She lived with a few other ladies in the Monroe House, and enjoyed going to Sancho’s for drinks and conversation.

2012: We have traveled to Europe, Africa, Mexico, and from west coast to east cost – and almost everywhere in between. We have enjoyed countless amazing live concerts, camping trips, and experiences that opened our eyes. We have witnessed friends meet, grow, get married, and have kids. We have seen the highest of the highs, and been to the lowest of the lows. We have seen life, and we have seen death. We have had two beautiful boys, and moved into an amazing house together.

Jobs have changed, housing has changed, friends have changed, families have changed, politics have changed, perspectives have changed, priorities have changed, we have changed…but ‘we’ have not changed. 10 years ago each of us walked into Sancho’s with some friends expecting a fun night of drinks, music, and happiness. Neither of us had any idea how much life was about to change – or how amazing it could be.

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Filed Under: Life in General, Photos Included

The Making Of A ShotSki

March 4, 2012 by 6 Comments

What is a ShotSki you ask? If you don’t know what one is, chances are pretty good that skiing isn’t a big part of your life….or if it is, you are about to be awakened to the new possibilities for old skis. The concept is pretty darn simple: take one old ski, and turn it into a shot drinking device for four people (usually to be used at a ski hill, but available for the occasional home use event). You will find instructions and corresponding images below (but first, a friend’s completed ski during use a few years ago):

Step 1: Procure old ski from basement, having kept it many years for this singular opportunity. Make sure it’s long enough, generally around 200 cm.
Step 2: Get medieval on it. Remove bindings. Make sure to have some variation on the following tools: many screwdrivers of each type, a chisel, a hammer, a dremel tool, and a hack saw.


Step 3: Clean, and paint (if desired).
Step 4: Use a 1.25″ hole saw and drill out places for the shot glasses to go. Realize after you start each hole that you won’t be able to complete the hole because the ski is skinnier than the drill bit. Be satisfied with just creating targets for the shot glasses to end up.


Step 5: Secure the shot glasses on the ski – I used contact cement….still waiting to see if that will be the final answer.


Step 6: Find the stickers that you have been accumulating for years and do your best to NASCAR up the ski with cool stickers from the past. Adds instant credibility to the ShotSki.


Step 7: Trail run. Enjoy the success!


Filed Under: Life in General, Photos Included

Editing Ezra

February 29, 2012 by 2 Comments

This is about words, and how our family’s realities collide with other non-suspecting people’s conversations.

We’ve spoken about it here before…about how difficult/weird/awkward it can be to talk with people about Liam. Especially people that we don’t know, or ones that we run into on a very casual basis (friendly faces at the gym, barber, etc). Ahna and I have gone from not even mentioning Liam in fear of ruining an otherwise superficial conversation to now being honest and straightforward when someone asks. Why should we hide or not include Liam’s life, even in these simple talks? The paraphrased exchange: do you have any children? yes, two. How old are they? our oldest son is almost four, and our youngest passed away when he was seven weeks old. Oh, I am so sorry. …and now we enter the awkwardness.

But the thing about this is that the question/answer is between two adults. We choose to ask the question because it’s the normal thing that you do. We choose to answer the way that we do because it’s important for us to talk about Liam, and to acknowledge publicly that this is our normal. We are (generally speaking) no longer afraid of where it goes.

Enter Ezra. Since day one, we have been honest, straightforward, and upfront with him about Liam. We have included him in our conversations, in our visits to the cemetery, and in our sadness. We talk about Liam all of the time, and so does Ezra. He understands. But his understanding is constantly evolving. We worried about how Ezra was going to react to Liam’s death, and how he would continue to deal with it over time. We listened and read about how this would be an on-going, never ending dialogue between us, and that he would have different reactions at different times in his growth.

For now, he knows what he knows. Ezra talks about Liam a lot, says hi to him when we pass by the cemetery, and will say that his brother is Liam. Sometimes he makes jokes using Liam’s name, we nervously laugh them off and direct him to a better punch line, but inside we are very happy that Liam is a part of his normal – even in loss. And its this comfort that he exhibits that finds us in bizarre places.

Last week we were in the waiting room at the pediatrician’s office, and Ezra was making nice with a young lady about his age. She started talking about her brother/sister (I can’t remember), and Ezra – plain as day – said “I have a brother. His name is Liam and he died.” The girl didn’t react – it probably went right over her head. The girl’s Mom turned and started to look at Ezra out of uneasiness, and I immediately blurted out “Ezra, that’s true, but we don’t need to tell everyone that.” Then the clarification questions came from the Mom and the surrounding parents, followed by the explanation, followed by the sympathy, followed by the awkwardness.

The part that didn’t sit right with me wasn’t what Ezra did, or what the girl didn’t do, or what the other parents did….it was my reaction. This is Ezra’s life, why should we be suppressing it when he tells other people about it? He didn’t lie, exaggerate, or make anything up – he told the cold, hard truth – in a 3.5 year old, stripped down kind of way. Now, I could certainly understand being a parent and having your child exposed to a topic of life that you weren’t prepared to expose them to yet. I know how that would be concerning, but I’m on the other end of the line on this one. Ezra’s not breaking news to them about guns, violence, sex, politics, hate, love, or money….he’s breaking news about his life. The coping of a 3.5 year old dealing with a loss of his brother – and I think I’m fine with that.

We continue to realize boundaries that have been destroyed for us still stand for others, and Ezra is running head first into walls of them everywhere. We are amazed at how much we learn from him learning. Maybe some parents will be disturbed if they hear Ezra talk about Liam. Maybe some will ignore it, maybe some will open a conversation with their child, and maybe some will understand completely due to their own experience. I don’t know. But at the risk of allowing Ezra to talk about Liam in a positive and productive way, I’ll take the gamble.

Filed Under: Ezra!, Liam!, Life in General

An Ezra Update: Photos And Videos

February 24, 2012 by 2 Comments

Soon more updates on Ezra will be coming you way (potty training, school, bull-headedness, etc)….but here are some fun photos and videos from the past couple of weeks.

Necessary sentence to space out the two videos because WordPress wants to compress them together for some reason.

Filed Under: Ezra!, Life in General, Photos Included, Video Included

Liam’s Headstone

February 22, 2012 by 3 Comments

The word ‘headstone’ is one of those words that people don’t like to say and have a hard time hearing. There are other words that are used in it’s place, for example: stone, monument, or memorial. The place that we got Liam’s from only called it a ‘marker.’ But let’s call a spade a spade: it’s a headstone. It’s hard for me to say primarily because it conjures up all sorts of movie-like images of the finality of the process; but we decided a long time ago to use words and terminology that correctly and aptly describes what we are talking about. It doesn’t do anyone any good to beat around the bush and risk misunderstanding….even at the risk of being a little straightforward for the common conversation.

This turned out to be one of those tasks that just didn’t get done until it felt right to do. For months and months after Liam died, there was no true desire or strength to try to pick out and design a headstone. We had met with someone fairly early on, but ultimately didn’t act on anything until late last year. There did actually come a time that we both just nodded our heads and decided to get it done; and that organic arrival made the deed of picking and designing something like a headstone a lot more palatable. And trust me, it’s barely palatable.

We set off on the design idea that it needed to be something simple, meaningful, and appropriate. Prior to this experience, neither of us had any idea about the vastness of different possibilities that are there for the taking – and the selections are rather intimidating. One of the barriers that we ran into was that Liam was so young, meaning that he hadn’t developed favorite anythings that we could highlight. There is every possible TV character, cartoon, sport, etc to choose from, but none of that was part of his life. So we had to think through our time with him, and we arrived at a design that we thought fit the bill of simple, meaningful, and appropriate.

We worked with a local (Denver) place to secure the stone, complete the design work, and have it made and temporarily installed by the year anniversary of when he died (Temporary because the ground is too frozen to properly install it. They will come back in a month or two when the ground thaws out some and permanently set it in place). And you know what? It feels good to have it there. We were a little surprised by feeling ‘good’ to have the headstone in place, but it was needed. Prior to the headstone arriving, any gravesite just gets something that actually can be described as a marker; so having the headstone installed lends a certain indescribable comfort.

The stone itself has a beveled top, is about two feet long, and about a foot-ish high at it’s highest point. It sits on a foundation that is a few inches larger all the way around, providing a place for people to leave things when they visit. The top features an Aspen tree on the left side (anyone that knows Ahna and I understands the meaning and importance to us), and stars surrounding his name (taken from The Little Prince, a book that we read to him while in the hospital). You’ll see his name, and life entering and departing dates; and at the bottom are the words “in our hearts.”

So if your in the area, stop by – his spot is a lot easier to find now. Leave something: a rock, a toy, a photo, anything you like. Visitors are good, and it’s good to visit.

In one of the stars, I shall be living. In one of them, I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night.
~ The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Filed Under: Ezra!, Photos Included
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